I’ve been doing a lot of mildly frightening things lately, stretching myself, and discovering what I can really do. But specifically, I’ve been much more intentional in my writing and treating it like a true job instead of a hobby or pipe dream. I’m updating on here more! And I’ve been working on a few stories, two new ones and one (very) old one.
In the past, I’ve been frightened of not being good enough or not being taken seriously, or any host of things (I just wrote about these fears, actually). I treated myself as less than because I was afraid that’s all I am. I treated my fiction as a hobby, even though I desperately want to be a true fiction author, because I was afraid that’s all I could make.
I’m done treating myself and my talents as unworthy.
I’m laughing in fear’s face and doing what I’m afraid of. “Courage is not the absence of fear but acting in spite of it” (this quote is usually attributed to Mark Twain, although that’s up for debate).
So I’m going to let you in.
I’ve been working and reworking a story for eleven years now. It has undergone so many revisions and expansions and changes in point of view. It was a cathartic vehicle for me to deal with my emotional life. And now, it is about 50,000 words long. Through this story, I’ve been able to move past my emotional needs and heal. I no longer need this story for myself, but it needs me. And now it is time to share it.
Take a look! Tell me if you like it or if it is, in fact, too saccharine. Send me constructive criticism. PRAY FOR ME. I may, someday, pursue publishing this novel.
Doing this has also given me the courage to keep pursuing the other stories I’ve started, so I’ll probably start uploading those to Wattpad soon, too. I’ll let you know when I do. I also have a couple other things up on Wattpad right now– a collection of poetry and a collection of short stories; although I update both infrequently, make sure to do me a favor and look at those, too.